“Empowerment is the process of becoming stronger and more confident, especially in controlling one’s life and claiming one’s rights.”
At a time when we feel like we have no control, we can feel empowered & positively impact our mental health by taking time out to set short and long-term financial goals. I am fortunate. When I was looking for a job almost 2 years after my divorce, I had already worked full time for almost 30 years. I also had savings from the sale of my home, and a retirement fund for the future.
For the last 5-years, I have benefited from the services of a financial planner in my community. My ex-husband had managed all the household finances, and while I am fairly intelligent I felt lost in this area. I will always remember when I met with Lisa after the divorce. I told her, “I don’t know how this works. I don’t understand what tax obligations I have and what I may need to plan for this year.” She told me that in any relationship there is usually one person in charge of the finances. She also told me she sees it as her job to bring the other person up to speed. Which she did – and I thank her for that.
My relationship with Lisa started simply: I was her client. During my transition I found her so easy to talk to that I asked her for some advice; advice that I could take for myself and offer to you. Here are some of the key insights she shared with me:
- Don’t let fear and pride get in the way of seeking advice. Remember, you are not adverse to change !
- Learn about math & numbers – if sought this can be taught.
- Plan ahead – don’t be reactionary, and most importantly be creative.
- Set goals and then work to meet those goals.
- Identify your skills, and remain teachable.
- Create a budget that lists your requirements (X) and your discretionary spending (Y) separately; be honest about what is truly a requirement.
- Think of (Y) as your aspirations; your wants not your needs, but still something to work towards.
- Plan ahead relative to “found money.” What will you do with a bonus or a tax refund? Found money is often used for (Y) – but is that the best use for it?
A clear budget will help you keep focused and not add debt to your list of things to worry about during this time. I knew what my (X) spending was and what my (Y) spending could be. It took me six months to find a job, so I told myself I always want six months of expenses sitting in savings. Again, it is about options, feeling in control, and feeling empowered. For resources to provide support and coaching during tough times, visit the sites of organizations Lisa shared with me below:
Be strong!
