I have been fortunate to have two mentors during my career: the first mentor was at the beginning of my career, the second is someone I no longer work with but who continues to coach and guide me as I face both new opportunities and new challenges every day. If you think you only need a mentor when you are in your 20’s – think again! Even top-level executives have mentors – often called ‘executive coaches’ – because if you aren’t learning you simply aren’t growing.
Erika Anderson writes, “…the tradition of having someone to support you with his or her wisdom and experience is probably as old as the human race. In any tribal society, younger members depended upon the older members to pass on their hard-won knowledge and insight about how to stay safe, find food and shelter, and understand the world around them.”
If you are seeking a career move or re-entering the workforce, having a mentor can be critical to your success. Having a coach will help you gain and retain your confidence. But, being a mentee doesn’t mean all you do is listen.
I recently took an on-line course, presented by Neal Whitten. What I learned is there are traits to an effective mentee and an effective mentor. I also learned that asking someone to mentor you should be tied directly to a goal. The goal can be related to learning a specific skill set, or it can be something like becoming adept at playing organizational politics. If you want to be an effective mentee, Mr. Whitten recommends you take the following actions:
- Identify a specific goal and make sure the goal is clear
- Seek out a mentor – don’t wait for someone to offer to mentor you
- Direct the relationship (the mentee takes the initiative, not the mentor)
- Don’t take things personally
- Stay positive
- Show appreciation
- Request feedback and ask for help
- Self-reflect
- Work through personal obstacles that may come up in the relationship
- Champion the mentor
At this stage in our life, it may be a little challenging to find the right mentor, as we need someone with more experience and insight – but look around. I guarantee there is someone you know who if asked, can share the lessons they have learned. Have fun with it – you may even build a valuable relationship that will last a lifetime! To learn the (5) qualities to look for in a mentor, read Ms. Anderson’s full article in Forbes. Show someone you value their support, show them how fabulous you are, and be strong!
